I don't like weddings.  My wife already knows about this, so there is no need for all of you to email this post to her.  I loved our wedding.  It was a very special day.  However, weddings in general…not a big fan.

To me, marriage is a spiritual event.  This post has nothing to do with the legal aspect of marriage.  Weddings represent two people becoming one in the eyes of God, and a covenant being made between the groom, the bride, and their Creator.  This is the beginning of a lifelong journey of joy, pain, trials, sorrow, and overwhelming happiness.  This is the beginning of that journey.  Not the end.  Not a step somewhere in the middle.

The divorce rate in our country is out of control.  Why?  I don’t have all the answers, but there is one factor, in particular, that I see as a major problem. 

People spend months and sometimes even years planning their wedding.  Some people dream about their wedding from the time they are children.  They plan out the location, the colors, the flowers, the food, the schedule, and organize dozens of loved ones that make it all happen.  But what is the one thing that most people forget to think about?  Yeah, you guessed it…the marriage.

I hear people all the time talking about how big your wedding day is.  I’ve even heard some say that it is the biggest day of your life.  Would you like me to tell you what day is more important than your wedding day?  Every day of marriage after that.  Every day that you are married and challenged to grow closer to God as a couple is more important than the day that you walk down the aisle.  Living out the covenant and vows that you make on your wedding day is much more righteous than just saying the words. 

I truly believe that if engaged couples would put as much time, effort, and focus on preparing for marriage as they do on the wedding itself, the divorce rate in America, especially among Christians, would see a large decline.  Putting the focus on God and taking the time to talk about the adjustments you will both have to make will prove to be much more valuable than spending hours upon hours arguing over the menu.

If you are married, I encourage you to share your wisdom with a young dating or engaged couple.  If you are engaged, I plead with you to find a good, Christian premarital counselor to help you prepare for how your lives are about to change.    If you are dating, or even if you are single, be preparing yourself to be the spouse that God wants you to be.  Focus on getting closer to Him, and He will lead you into a marriage that He has prepared and is ready to bless.

I love my wife.  Our wedding was great.  But thanks to God and the work we put into our relationship during our engagement, our marriage has been amazing.  

I really do hope that you enjoy(ed) your wedding.  But I pray that you get to experience the indescribable joy and peace that come with a God-centered marriage.

khristina abner
8/1/2012 11:23:05 pm

this is very true God has to be in the center or you and spouse will be miserable and fight alot.... I am very blessed to have a wonderful Christian husband , that stands and preaches the word of God, and helps teach my kids about the Lord...

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colleen donathan
8/2/2012 07:54:40 am

Great post!! As Brett and I have been working on our own wedding plans, I keep thinking, "do we really need to do A or have B as part of our wedding celebration?" In a lot of cases, I've been able to say no, to try to keep things simple. But thanks for the extra reminder to focus less on the day, and more on everything that comes after. =)

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Dawn Fizer
8/3/2012 01:07:09 am

Hey Jamie! This was so awesome and perfect timing. Our Sunday School class is doing a study on Staying In Love and Terry and I are teaching the last week of the series. Pretty sure I am going to use some of this. Don't worry we will give you full credit and with any luck a few more followers :)

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8/20/2012 03:19:45 pm

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