The one hat I know that I need to wear more is the one that helps me be more consistent. Granted, certain situations call for different levels and amounts of “me.” I need to be a little more professional in big meetings and I can be a little more relaxed when I am lounging around with my friends. However, I still need to be the same “me” all the time. The core of who I am should never change. The discipline with which I perform my job should also apply to my youth ministry. The servant attitude that comes with being a deacon should also be there when I am at home with my family. Keeping my mouth shut when asked to sing is often essential when spending time with my wife, or at least that’s what I’m told.
If you were to make a list of your roles as I have above, and you were to put them in order (which mine are not), a great rule of thumb is to always work from the top down. For example, let’s say my life of roles looked like this: 1. Christian 2. Husband 3. Father 4. Friend. That means I should be a Christian all the time, which is a no-brainer. When I am a husband, I should remember that I am also a Christian and maintain everything that comes with that. With my children, I need to maintain my role as a husband make sure I am providing a solid Christian example. And when I am with a friend, I have to make sure all of my other hats are on all snug and tight.
In other words, establish the things that are really important to you. Make sure your values are true to your core. Then maintain those values no matter what hat you are wearing, no matter what setting you find yourself in, no matter who you are with, and no matter what role you are trying to play. As usual, I realize this is easier said than done. However, once you decide who you are truly going to be, you never have to change or adjust who you are in any situation. You are who you are. And that's a pretty peaceful feeling.
But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me. (1 Corinthians 15:10 NIV)